


Stronger Than Us

by menel, Mixk



Series: Stronger Than Us [3]
Category: Pacific Rim (2013)
Genre: First Kiss, First Time, Gifset, M/M, Slash
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2013-10-05
Updated: 2013-10-13
Packaged: 2017-12-28 11:48:32
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 8
Words: 10,079
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/991672
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/menel/pseuds/menel, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mixk/pseuds/Mixk
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Raleigh had that magnetic effect, attracting people to him like flies to honey, and Herc was no exception. He eventually found the strength to take his eyes off of Raleigh, and he took no consolation in the fact that he had to turn his entire body around to stop looking.</p><p>(Only chapter 3 contains explicit material)</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [menel](https://archiveofourown.org/users/menel/gifts).

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a short drabble, no relation to the other two parts of this series. Feel free to write more to this if inspiration strikes you, menel ! I'll never say no to your writing :)

     
   

Herc's breath got caught somewhere in his throat at the sight of that golden skin glistening with sweat, unable to get his eyes off of the strong and lean body. It was unbecoming, he knew, to lust after someone almost half his age, but it was stronger than him.

Raleigh had that magnetic effect, attracting people to him like flies to honey, and Herc was no exception. He eventually found the strength to take his eyes off of Raleigh, and he took no consolation in the fact that he had to turn his entire body around to stop looking.

He walked away, a deep frown marring his face as he scolded himself for his inappropriate behavior. What did Raleigh even think of him? Herc wouldn't blame him if Raleigh thought of him as some kind of old pervert, because in a sense, he was. 

"Herc!"

He ignored Raleigh's calls, picking up the pace to get to his quarters as fast as possible, but barely a second later he was stopped by a firm grip on his arm. He was turned around, and Jesus Christ, Raleigh hadn't even bothered putting on a shirt. They were standing close, and Herc's breathing became increasingly heavy, his heart hammering loud in his ears.

He managed to keep his eyes on Raleigh's—not without some strong willpower—and for a while, they just stared at each other, until he couldn't stand the silence any longer.

"What—"

Raleigh cut him off before he could even finish, his lips capturing his in a searing kiss, to which Herc could only respond, his body moving on its own accord to bring Raleigh's closer. They kissed like starved men, and Herc realized that they were. He hadn't had that kind of contact in years, and he figured Raleigh probably hadn't either.

"Spend the night with me," Raleigh muttered when they pulled away, their panting breaths mingling together as they rested their foreheads against each other. Their eyes met, and for a brief second, Herc saw a flash of doubt in those wide blue eyes. Any last restraint he had died in that moment, and so he nodded at Raleigh, the side of his lips curving up in a small grin.

Raleigh's blinding smile was a reward on its own, the genuine glee mixed with mischief in his expression the most intriguing thing Herc had ever laid his eyes on. Raleigh caught his hand, dragging Herc towards his quarters, taking his heart along with him.


	2. Stronger Than Us (Remix)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the same drabble remixed from Raleigh's perspective. Mixk's work is too inspiring to let the opportunity pass. Enjoy! - menel

Raleigh’s barely had any time to settle into his new quarters in the Hong Kong Shatterdome. Everything since his arrival has been a flurry of activity and the whole experience feels unreal to him, being thrust back into the offensive heart of the Kaiju War after being a civilian for the past five years. Pentecost had remarked that he’d been a difficult man to find and Raleigh supposed it was true. He hadn’t given much thought anymore to where he lived, “chasing the Wall” as he’d told Pentecost, helping to build something he knew would never be able to withstand a Kaiju attack. The Wall was an exercise in futility and in many ways it had become the symbol of his life. You just kept going and going until one day it was over. The difference was people were coming to terms with the idea that it was going to be over very soon. 

Pentecost would fight until the end. There had never been any doubt about that. Men like him would use every last resource that was available, every last scrap or hunk of metal that could be turned into a fighting machine, every last pilot that had ever been in a Conn-pod, including washed up has-beens like himself. Raleigh didn’t think he’d ever stood a chance when Pentecost had stepped out of that chopper. His former CO was every bit the formidable presence that he remembered. For Pentecost, refusal had never been an option.

It was Pentecost’s iron will more than Raleigh’s own determination that saw him now attempting to settle in at the Hong Kong Shatterdome. His quarters were much like all the other quarters he’d ever had in the different Shatterdomes around the world, except that they were smaller, meant for a single occupant instead of the double room he’d always shared with Yancy. He’d been on his own now for five years but it was different being back in a ‘dome. Everything reminded him of what had been lost and he felt his brother’s absence acutely. 

He needed a proper shower, but he’d settled for washing his face and rubbing his upper body with the damp towel. He’d left the door to his room open since privacy was a privilege he’d long forgone, but as he turned towards the door, he caught sight of Herc just beyond. Their eyes met briefly before Herc turned away. The other man looked frustrated, almost angry even and Raleigh was jolted by the thought. He didn’t understand it but the thought of Herc being angry with him for whatever reason was the last straw. _That_ he wouldn’t be able to take. 

He was out the door before he knew it, chasing after Herc down the corridor and calling his name. The other man didn’t stop. Instead, he seemed to increase his pace and Raleigh jogged at a quick clip just to catch up with him. He did, grasping Herc by the arm and turning him around. Herc looked flushed, frustrated and – was Raleigh reading this correctly? – embarrassed too. Raleigh didn’t speak. Whatever he’d been planning to say had died in his throat at the sight of the other man. Talk about coming face to face with an old crush. His thoughts flitted to Yancy again, the only person he’d ever told about his feelings for the older man. He could never keep anything from his brother and that was _before_ the drift had made the idea of secrets impossible. Yancy had chided him, but to Raleigh’s surprise, had encouraged him too. “Go on, Rals,” Yancy had said back in Manila. “Since when have you been shy?” 

But Herc was no Jaeger fly, nor some star struck fan or a would-be easy lay. Raleigh wanted something more than that, and he was reminded of those desires now as they stared at each other in silence. Finally, Herc broke the silence. 

_“Go on, Rals. Since when have you been shy?”_

Raleigh heeded his brother’s words and didn’t allow Herc to finish his sentence, crushing their mouths together in a bruising kiss. Herc’s response was immediate and the kiss became frantic, almost desperate right out in the middle of the hallway for the entire corps to see. Raleigh didn’t care. Herc made him feel alive, made him think that life wasn’t just about waiting for the end, made him believe that there could be something on the other side. 

“Spend the night with me,” he muttered when the kiss ended, shocked that the words had fallen from his mouth. He barely knew the man. But whatever doubts he had were washed away by the slow curve of Herc’s lips and the acceptance Raleigh could see on his face. His confidence returned, together with the swagger in his step and for a moment he thought he’d recaptured that cocky youth from six years ago in Manila who’d been brash and bold, but not when it came to Ranger Hercules Hansen. Raleigh knew he wasn’t the same person. He had been humbled, broken and lost, but Herc was real and standing in front of him, offering him his comfort and his company, his solace and perhaps even his love. 

Raleigh grasped that proffered hand and all that it promised. The world was different when you were no longer alone.


	3. Just A Feeling

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just had to write more, I couldn't get this scene out of my head. This chapter contains explicit scenes ! (It's basically the porn scene that follows the previous chapters ~) - Mixk

What was he doing?

Panic started to coil inside Herc as they approached Raleigh's quarters, the fear of disappointing the latter washing over him. It had been a while since he last participated in any bed activities, even longer since his last time with a man. Though he hated to admit it, he wasn't getting any younger, and didn't have the stamina of his youth. His pants were getting tighter by the second though, and that was enough to quell his worries.

Raleigh's hand in his was a grounding presence, strong and reassuring, and it was only a matter of seconds before they were back at Raleigh's room—Herc hadn't gotten that far. Herc found himself tackled to the barely closed door behind him as soon as they got in, Raleigh's mouth crushing his with a hunger that only added to fuel Herc's excitement and urgency. He gave back as good as he got, moving his lips along Raleigh's, his arms wrapped around that strong back he'd admired from afar. Before he knew it, they were both grinding their hips against each other, seeking that delicious friction between their erect cocks.

Raleigh broke off the kiss abruptly, and looked Herc straight in the eye, his pupils blown wide as a grin spread across his face. He gazed down at Herc's crotch, his hand palming through the rough denim before looking back up at him, the question evident in Raleigh's eyes. 

"May I?" Raleigh asked, his rough voice a sweet melody Herc never expected to be graced with, and it made him want to hear it all the time. He'd lost his voice, and only nodded fervently in response, throwing his head back against the door, eyes closed as Raleigh made quick work of his pants. The cool air hit his now freed cock, but it wasn't long before Herc felt a wet warmth enveloping him—and holy shit, Raleigh was good at giving head. He'd never doubted Raleigh's capabilities, but Herc had never felt so blissful. His hands found Raleigh's head, his fingers running through those soft locks while Raleigh kept on doing miracles with his tongue and mouth.

"Come here," Herc said as he pulled his cock out of Raleigh's mouth before the latter brought him over the edge, pulling the latter back up to his feet for another kiss. Raleigh let him direct the kiss this time, and so Herc took things slower, hands framing Raleigh's face. God he could kiss Raleigh forever. They undressed each other fast, and Raleigh grabbed his hand again, taking him to his bed. Raleigh threw Herc on the mattress, straddling him and hovering over him like a predator. Herc grew impatient, and brought Raleigh's body down to cover his, wanting to feel as much of Raleigh as possible. He could finally feel Raleigh's cock sliding alongside his as they kept kissing, their hips moving at a languorous pace. Raleigh's soft moans, along with his incredible scent, made Herc go insane, and pretty quickly, Herc was overwhelmed, nerve endings firing everywhere at once when his climax hit. 

Raleigh didn't take long to join him, and bit Herc's neck softly as he let his release spill on their stomachs, his entire body going limp on Herc. It was oddly comforting, feel the weight of Raleigh's body resting on him, and for a while, they stayed like this; Herc's arms wrapped around Raleigh, the latter nuzzling his neck, leaving kisses there.

"You're amazing," Raleigh whispered, and it sent shivers down Herc's spine. This didn't feel like anything Herc had ever experienced before, and it certainly wasn't just physical lust Raleigh brought out of him. This moment right now was so much more than what a quick fuck would ever bring. Herc didn't want to move, afraid to break the comfortable silence, but the stickiness on his abdomen was starting to make him feel uneasy.

He pressed a kiss to the top of Raleigh's head as he moved to get something to clean them up, only to be stopped by a hand on his waist.

"Here, let me," Raleigh said as he kissed his way down Herc's chest, his tongue licking at the wet skin over Herc's abs, effectively licking Herc clean. The sight was just sinful and mesmerizing, and it only made Herc's cock come back to life. As though sensing Herc watching him, Raleigh looked up at him with that mischievous grin of his, moving back to kiss him, letting Herc taste their mixed cum. Raleigh swiped the rest of it on his stomach with his hand, licking his fingers clean before flopping down on the mattress by Herc's side.

"You're just full of surprises, aren't you?" Herc said when Raleigh settled beside him, head resting on Herc's shoulder with a content smile on his face.

"Is that a bad thing?"

"No, it just makes me like you more," Herc let slip out before he could stop himself. Herc never had managed to filter himself around Raleigh; even back in Manila, the kid had Herc defenseless and his heart laid bare for him to do whatever he wanted with it. Cautions be damned, he thought as he looked down at the beautiful young man in his arms. Whatever he felt for Raleigh, it was just a feeling he couldn't shake off, something that made him forget they were approaching the end of the world, made him think life was worth living, even after everything they'd lost. And Herc jus wasn't ready to let it go.

Raleigh flashed him that overwhelming smile Herc loved so much before giving him a peck on his lips, his own arms squeezing Herc's body tight, their legs tangling together.

"Let me know when you're ready for round two, 'cause I am nowhere near finished with you," Raleigh said, regarding him with a hungry look.

"Give an old man a minute, ok?" Herc said with a chuckle, carding his fingers through Raleigh's hair.

"Pssht, you're not old," Raleigh scolded him, pressing another kiss to his lips. "You're scolding hot, is what you are."

"I didn't realize you were going to be dangerous for my ego," Herc shook his head, smiling despite himself. 

"And for so many other things too, if you're willing to stick around to find out," Raleigh said, his words holding so much promise that Herc felt a strong want for the war to be over surge through him, if only so he could share that future Raleigh's talking about.

"Can't wait," Herc replied, a soft smile gracing his lips. And as he looked at Raleigh's beautiful face, hope settled in his heart for good.


	4. Chapter 4

    

    

    

    

    

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The day after ! I totally didn't plan for this to happen when I started making the gifset. Only when I saw Chuck did the idea come to me. -Mixk


	5. The Morning After or Don't Ask, Don't Tell (Don't Pursue, Don't Harass)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Aaand, I couldn't help myself. Not with a gifset that ended like that! This is probably/maybe/should be the last part. (Unless Mixk goes and does something else inspiring. Hmph.) 
> 
> But we're not really upset, are we? Enjoy! - menel

“I think your son is living in a different era,” Raleigh said as he watched Chuck storm out of the mess hall with his pet bulldog trailing beside him. He couldn’t remember the dog’s name. “DADT was abolished back in 2011,” he went on. “And unless things have changed, the PPDC doesn’t have strict regs on fraternization, unless we’re talking about superior officers.” 

He glanced at Herc who had stoically put up with his son’s outburst but hadn’t actually said anything to contradict Chuck’s assumptions. It occurred to Raleigh that Herc might actually agree with Chuck and the realization was like a punch to the gut. What if he’d read last night completely wrong? What if Herc thought _he_ was just an easy lay? They’d both been so starved for physical affection. Wasn’t everyone getting in one last good fuck before the end of the world? Raleigh returned his attention to his food. He couldn’t appreciate the fact that there was no rationing at the Hong Kong Shatterdome. He’d just lost his appetite. He listlessly began to move around the corn and carrots on his tray when he felt a nudge at his elbow. He looked up again and met Herc’s even gaze. 

“You don’t think I’m your superior officer?” Herc questioned, his tone perfectly serious but there was something in his eyes that let Raleigh know the other man was joking. 

“Are you pulling rank on me, old man?” Raleigh returned, barely managing to keep a straight face and an equally serious tone. 

To Raleigh’s surprise, it was Herc who caved first, a small grin curling the corners of his lips as he leaned towards him. Herc dropped his voice as he said, “There are many things I’d like to do to you. Pulling rank does have its advantages.” 

Herc’s bedroom voice was going straight to Raleigh’s cock and Raleigh had to think of the most unappealing things – smelly gym socks, his frightening fourth grade teacher, Mrs. Poole – in order to will his growing erection down. There was no way he was going to get a boner in the mess hall from Herc’s mild innuendo. Herc’s grin grew a bit wider. He could probably tell that Raleigh was feeling a little warm in his sweater. 

“That flush I see heating the side of your face?” Herc went on conversationally, keeping his voice low. “It suits you. It looks even better when you’re beneath me, when it runs down your torso as you gasp my name.” 

“Jesus Christ, Herc,” Raleigh hissed, looking at the other man with wide eyes. “If you don’t shut up, I’m going to go down on you right now.” 

This made Herc laugh outright, a loud deep laugh that caught the attention of those nearest to them. Raleigh could only look at the other man in wonder. This Herc, one so free and unrestrained, was incongruous with the Herc he’d known and imagined as a colleague and a Ranger. Raleigh could feel himself falling that little bit more. They still had so much to learn about each other, and so little time. 

Herc was still grinning when he slung an arm about Raleigh’s shoulders, drawing the younger man against him and not caring at all that they were in public. Raleigh felt like they were broadcasting some kind of radio beacon: _Good morning, PPDC! We slept together last night! It was fucking amazing! This could be love found right before the apocalypse. Thank you for listening. Please return to your regularly scheduled program._

“Don’t mind Chuck,” Herc told him practically in his ear. “The kid’s got emotional issues. Gets them from his old man.” He punctuated his statement with a quick kiss to Raleigh’s temple before releasing him. 

“Is that your way of saying that you’re emotionally constipated?” Raleigh questioned, unable to stop his own grin. 

“You’ve got to bring something to this relationship,” Herc replied. 

Raleigh could practically feel his glow at Herc’s use of the word ‘relationship’ and he effortlessly continued their banter. “You mean my body and great sex isn’t enough?” 

Herc gave him a sideways look of approval. “It’s a start,” he said. “Youth and stamina counts for something. But I am serious about Chuck,” he added. 

“Chuck _did_ sound pretty serious himself,” Raleigh pointed out. 

Herc sighed. Underneath the table, Raleigh felt the other man shift so that their legs were touching from knee to ankle. “I’m serious too,” he told Raleigh, all levity gone now. “We’ll work this out.” 

Raleigh nodded. His appetite had returned and he scooped up some of his mashed potatoes feeling the warmth of Herc’s leg against his own. He understood what Herc _hadn’t_ said. It would be worth it to work this out for whatever time they had left.


	6. Kiss Me Hard Before You Go (Summertime Sadness)

Herc had remained silent while Chuck spoke, but his face hid nothing, the words resonating in his mind. Chuck wasn't wrong. The PPDC would most likely frown upon this...what it was he had started with Raleigh. Especially now, when they were relied on more than ever, when things were about to go to shit if they didn't get their shit straight. He wasn't just a dispendable soldier—hell, he was probably the next in line to be Marshall, if it ever came to that. Could they afford the distraction? Herc had no idea how Stacker would see this. Would his old friend understand how much Herc needed this? How in this moment of impeding doom, of fear and panic, he'd somehow managed to find one last ray of hope in Raleigh? Herc couldn't picture Stacker disapproving, much less forbidding a relationship with Raleigh. 

He barely heard Raleigh's comment on Chuck's intervention, and didn't know how to explain to the younger man that regulations indeed were stricter for superior officers, and had nothing to do with DADT. Chuck knew exactly where to hit when it came to hurting him, and he'd pointed out the exact reason why he could possibly not pursue anything with Raleigh. One glance at Raleigh beside him knocked the breath out of Herc. Raleigh looked down right dejected, playing with the food on his plate, and it was enough for Herc to swear in that moment to do everything in his power to keep that look away from Raleigh's face.

“You don’t think I’m your superior officer?” Herc asked, trying to broach the subject one step at a time.

“Are you pulling rank on me, old man?” Raleigh returned, and Herc tried not to flinch at those last words. He was so used to having Chuck call him that, it somehow felt funny to have Raleigh call him that, especially with the affectious tone behind it. They entered one of those silly stare down contests—who was he kidding, Herc could never resist Raleigh, and so he caved, a soft smile pulling at his lips. Only now did he really take the time to admire how amazing Raleigh looked, with that bed hair, that light sweater, and that oh so broad chest. Herc wasn't hungry for food anymore, and the thought gave him an idea.

“There are many things I’d like to do to you. Pulling rank does have its advantages," he said in a low tone, still fixing Raleigh with an intense gaze, and the result was absolutely satisfying. To see Raleigh shift uneasily, a flush creeping up on the latter's cheeks, and to know he was responsible for that? It made Herc feel more alive than ever. He couldn't stop now.

“That flush I see heating the side of your face?” Herc kept going, curious to see just how far he could take this teasing. “It suits you. It looks even better when you’re beneath me, when it runs down your torso as you gasp my name.”

“Jesus Christ, Herc,” Raleigh hissed, wide-eyed and mouth agape, fueling Herc's spirits. “If you don’t shut up, I’m going to go down on you right now.”

It felt like the sweetest of victories, one that Herc was well intent on filing in his memory forever, the happiness bubbling out of him in laughter. He wanted to keep pushing, if only to see if Raleigh would keep his word, and it surprised Herc just how much the idea appealed to him. To have Raleigh take him here right in the middle of the mess hall, where everyone could see just whom Raleigh belonged to? It amazed Herc how Raleigh was making him discover new things about himself at his age. It made Herc forget Chuck's threats for one moment, and he couldn't stop himself from touching Raleigh, bringing the latter closer to him with an arm securely draped over his shoulders.

“Don’t mind Chuck,” Herc told him, leaning close to his ear. “The kid’s got emotional issues. Gets them from his old man.”

Being this close to Raleigh, with the latter's enticing scent invading his senses, it made Herc crave even more physical contact. On a whim, he pressed a quick kiss to Raleigh's temple, letting go of the younger man when he realized what he'd done. He was in no way ashamed, but he figured it would probably be best to keep things the least bit professional when they were in public.

“Is that your way of saying that you’re emotionally constipated?” Raleigh inquired, with that half-innocent half-guilty grin that would never cease to intrigue Herc. He didn't think anyone but Raleigh could pull that one off.

“You’ve got to bring something to this relationship,” Herc replied with a shrug, the fact that he'd just declared the two of them in a relationship only computing a second after he'd said the words. The radical change in Raleigh's expression vanquished any regret he might have felt, the sheer happiness on the other man's face spread warmth all over Herc's chest. It gave him immense relief to know that _this_ , whatever they had going on, mattered just as much to Raleigh.

“You mean my body and great sex isn’t enough?”

That stirred a chuckle out of Herc, and he glanced at Raleigh, shaking his head as he did so. The kid was just never going to stop surprising him, and he really did make Herc feel young again.  

"It's a start. Youth and stamina counts for something. But I am serious about Chuck," he said, trying to ease Raleigh's worries. He didn't want Raleigh to worry about any problem they might encounter. Herc would move mountains to spend however little time he had left with Raleigh, even if it meant dealing with an angry son, or disapproving superiors. 

“Chuck did sound pretty serious himself,” Raleigh pointed out, and this time, Herc wasn't able to stop the flinch those words brought out.

He let out a long sigh, shifting to find a better position—and if it meant more contact with Raleigh, he wasn't going to complain. 

“I’m serious too,” he told Raleigh, hoping his tone would convince the latter. “We’ll work this out.”

Herc wanted to believe his own words, and could only hope they were going to be fine. Seeing Raleigh resume eating was enough to reassure him, and so they finished their breakfast in a comforting camaraderie. Raleigh was so easy to talk to, there never was a moment when Herc felt awkward being around Raleigh, even in silence. That was what made things feel so right between them, and Herc was going to fight like hell to keep their relationship alive, to nurture it. 

Herc walked Raleigh to the kwoon—jogging would be a more appropriate term, really, their fooling around having almost made them late. Today was the first day of the 'Who's going to be Raleigh Becket's new co-pilot' competition, and Herc was going to get first row seats to that show. Stacker leveled him with a raised eyebrow when they showed up together at 05:57, looking flushed and panting, but Herc brushed that off, sending Raleigh off to the mat.

Watching Raleigh take his opponents down one by one was a thing of wonders, and Herc would be lying if he said the sight wasn't turning him on. Raleigh moved with grace, his defined muscles glistening in the ambient light of the room. He wanted to get on the sparring mat badly, wanted to rise up to the challenge that was Raleigh Becket. And damn if Raleigh wasn't good. It had been five years, and the man was still a fearsome warrior, through and through. Herc couldn't help but feel proud. 

He didn't expect to see Mako as Raleigh's next opponent. She had become quite the fighter, Herc noted as he watched her stand up to Raleigh. He'd seen that little girl grow with Chuck, and in a sense, she was like family to him. He understood Stacker's reluctance to have her fight kaijus—hell, he had fought like a beast to stop Chuck, but his son was as stubborn as his old man. There was no stopping that train, so Herc did the next best thing: he fought with Chuck, to make sure no harm would ever come his son's way.

He could see Stacker growing more uneasy by the second beside him, and Herc wasn't surprised when his friend put an end to the session. 

"She's my co-pilot," Raleigh declared, and Herc couldn't have agreed more. None of the other cadets had even come close to being Raleigh's equal. 

"That's not going to work," Stacker returned, as unmoving as ever, and Herc could already feel the fire of defiance burn in Raleigh's eyes. Raleigh wasn't going to let that go so easily, but then again, knowing Stacker's impatience and stubbornness, Herc knew his friend would come out winning the argument.

"Why not?"

"Because I said so, Mr. Becket," Stacker said,  his tone leaving no room for discussion. "I've made my decision. Report to the shatterdome in two hours, you'll find out who your co-pilot will be."

Just like that, everyone was dismissed, and Herc followed after his friend, but not before giving Raleigh a nod to tell him to go after Mako. Herc didn't miss the smug satisfaction on Chuck's face, shaking his head in frustration as he caught up with Stacker.

"Stacker!"

"Herc," Stacker said as he kept walking, making Herc keep up with him.

"You can't keep her out of the fight forever," Herc said, wondering why he even cared enough to go fight for her. Well, if he thought about it, it wasn't that big of a mystery. He cared about Mako, knew how much it mattered to her, to fight the monsters that took everything from her. Most importantly, he cared about Raleigh, and he realized he didn't trust anyone else but Mako to co-pilot with him.

"And you can't afford to have any distraction," Stacker shot back, stopping dead in his tracks to fix him with one of his signature stares, something Herc was immune to. He wasn't even surprised Stacker knew about he and Raleigh at this point—very few things got past the man—but he wasn't going to let that rattle him.

"You know Raleigh's right, you know I'm right. You've seen them. I don't think anyone's going to be a better match for Raleigh. And I can't think of anyone else more capable, more deserving of piloting Gipsy Danger than Mako," Herc added, watching Stacker's expression intently to see if he was making any kind of impact whatsoever.

"Don't you have a physical evaluation to get to, old friend?" Stacker said after a moment of silence, making it clear he wasn't going to hear any more of it, but Herc knew his point had gone through to Stacker. Herc nodded, turning around to leave, but was stopped by Stacker's cold voice.

"One more thing, Herc."

"Yeah?" Herc responded, cold sweat starting to form as he dreaded the next words coming out of his friend's mouth.

"Whatever it is you have going on with Mr. Becket? End it."

"Or else what?" Herc dared ask, feeling the thump of his heart crisped with fear. Had he heard right? Had Stacker actually ordered him to break things off with Raleigh? To say he'd fallen from high would have been an understatement. Herc couldn't believe what his oldest friend had just asked him to do, and above all, he didn't understand _why_.

"I would rather not have things come to that," Stacker replied, expression stern before Herc. 

"You could at least let me know why I should end something—no, the  _only_ thing that actually gives me some hope in this hellhole," Herc snapped, feeling the anger surge through him like adrenaline. People often wondered how he and Chuck were so different, how the ever so calm and composed Herc Hansen could have such a hot headed son. They just didn't know better, didn't know that Chuck did get his temper from him.

"I don't want anything disturbing Chuck or Mako in the drift," Stacker answered curtly.

"Mako?" was the only thing Herc could say, at a loss for words. He had never given much thought to his son, how his relationship with Raleigh would affect them. It never even occurred to him that it could become an issue. He just hoped Chuck would be mature enough to just deal with it, and accept it like a grown up. But who was he kidding, this was Chuck they were talking about. His son had given them enough grief earlier over breakfast, and Herc could only imagine what else Chuck could do. His son didn't seem to hold Raleigh very dearly in his heart, God only knew why. But Mako was another thing. Had he actually convinced Stacker to let her pilot with Raleigh? Could his relationship with Raleigh actually affect her enough to compromise their neural handshake? They couldn't afford a dysfunctional ranger team, not now of all times, Herc understood that. 

"Good bye, Herc."

Herc stood in the empty hallway, hands curled into fists at his side as he replayed Stacker's words in his mind. He didn't want to end things with Raleigh, but was it worth the lives of billions? Was it worth risking the end of the world over? Herc felt the weight of his selfish desire fall down on him, pictured a crushed Raleigh when he broke the news to him, and it made him livid.

"What am I going to do?" he whispered into the air, feeling hopeless.

"There you are!"

Herc jolted up, turning around to see Raleigh approaching him, and he felt every muscle in his body tense up.  _No. No, no, no_. He wasn't ready to face Raleigh just yet, he hadn't even made a decision. He forced a smile, knowing it was crisped, but he didn't have it in him to disappoint Raleigh, not when the latter probably felt disheartened enough by Stacker's rebuttal earlier. Herc didn't know for sure Stacker had changed his mind about Mako piloting with Raleigh, and he didn't want to give the younger man false hopes.

"How's Mako?" Herc asked casually, trying to find a safe topic of conversation. 

"She's...fine, I guess," Raleigh replied, heaving a sigh as he took Herc's hand in his, rubbing circles on his palm. "Disappointed. As am I."

"Don't worry, I'm sure Stacker will realize his mistake," Herc said, hoping it would extend to Stacker's views on his relationship with Raleigh. "Sooner or later."

"You know what I could use, though?" Raleigh said, regarding him with a grin that was warm enouh to melt any cold bastard's heart. Herc wondered in that instant if Raleigh had ever been said no to. 

"What is—"

Herc never seemed to be able to finish his sentences around Raleigh, the latter cutting him off with a desperate kiss, one that Herc needed just as much. He clung onto Raleigh, envelopping the other man in a tight embrace as their tongues danced together. Herc couldn't help but feel this was going to be his last chance to feel Raleigh this way, to have this amazing, kind-hearted man in his arms. And if this was going to be their last kiss, Herc would enjoy it, would make it last as long as possible.

"Wow," Raleigh whispered, sounding out of breath. "Not that I'm complaining, but what's gotten into you?"

"Nothing," Herc lied, hating himself as he did so. "Did it ever occur to you that seeing you spar was a massive turn on for me?"

"Why, Herc, you're giving me ideas."

"That's what I was aiming for," Herc said, but didn't give the words much heart. He didn't have it in him anymore.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, I couldn't possibly stop where menel had left things off. This started out as a rewrite of the 5th chapter in Herc's POV, but turned out to be...this. I'm a sucker for angst and drama. Things are spiraling out of control. I hope you enjoy where the story's going though, as unplanned as it is. ~ Mixk


	7. Try-Outs and Trials (or If the Shoe Fits . . .)

They arrived barely in time for the start of the trials. Raleigh probably should’ve been embarrassed for almost being late to his own candidate trials, but he forgot all that when he felt the gentle pressure of Herc’s hand at the small of his back pushing him onto the mat. Raleigh shot him an incredulous look. He’d never imagined Herc to be the sort to touch another person so physically in public – the type to show any kind of physical affection really – but in the short time since they’d slept together, Herc was proving him wrong. Not that Herc’s light touches were public displays of affection (well, there was the kiss to his temple during breakfast), but they took Raleigh by surprise every time. _He_ was the tactile one. He liked to touch and to be touched. If Herc kept this up, it would be harder and harder to restrain those impulses in public, especially since they’d tacitly agreed that they should be professional for the sake of appearances. 

Raleigh would be the first to admit that he was a tad distracted that morning. He hadn’t sparred with anyone in five years and he could feel his own rust. Thankfully, it didn’t seem that anyone else noticed that he was not quite on top of his game. Raleigh felt that said a lot more about the quality of the candidates that had been chosen – pickings must’ve been very slim – rather than his own ability at that time. Still, he noted that Herc was watching him with something akin to a flush of pride or perhaps the sparring was turning the other man on. Either scenario seemed equally plausible to him. Beside him, Pentecost was as unreadable as ever, stern and silent as he watched the proceedings impassively. On the other side of Pentecost was Mako with her clipboard, calling out the scores and taking notes. She looked unimpressed. Raleigh couldn’t blame her. He would’ve been unimpressed too. 

As much of the crew and staff of the Shatterdome that were otherwise unoccupied had crowded themselves into the Kwoon and its entrance for the trials. It was probably the most excitement the old ‘Dome had had in a while, at least since the remaining Jaegers had been shipped off to Hong Kong. It was hard not to miss Chuck, who had managed to nab for himself a prime spot in the Kwoon. While the other spectators were crowded closely together, there was a little ring of space around Chuck, demonstrating the sort of respect the PPDC personnel had for the Ranger. He was Chuck fucking Hansen and nobody got in his personal space, except for his dad and Pentecost. The daggers that he threw in Raleigh’s direction were unmistakable too. They said, _Put me in that ring with you and watch me kick your ass._ Raleigh ignored him even though he suspected that Chuck might be right. The kid was in peak physical shape while he’d been building a fucking wall. Plus, Chuck had the added advantage of studying his technique now while Raleigh had no idea what kind of fighter Chuck was. Truthfully, Chuck looked like a brawler to him and the thought made him smile. He was a brawler himself, had the scars from dirty bar fights to prove it. Maybe he and Chuck would be evenly matched after all. 

In the end, however, it was Mako who voiced her displeasure. She called him out for toying with his opponents, making the points last longer than necessary, instead of finishing them off quickly like she knew he could. Inwardly, Raleigh was amused. Mako was showing her cards whether she realized it or not. She was familiar with his style, which meant that she had watched his tape. She’d said as much when she’d first brought him to his new quarters, only Raleigh hadn’t realized back then how _well_ she’d studied his old fights. She wanted this. He could practically feel it radiating off of her. She’d described his style as unpredictable, but the fact that she’d studied him so closely had been an attempt on her part to gauge and adapt her own style to his. They needed to be in sync. The drift was about compatibility. He would give her the chance. 

Raleigh held out his hanbō, pointing it directly at Mako but he addressed Pentecost when he spoke. “How about we give her a shot?” he challenged. 

Mako’s eyes lit up and the look she gave Pentecost was nothing short of imploring. Pentecost looked as immovable as ever and Raleigh was genuinely surprised when the Marshal gave his consent. He had called Mako his ‘best.’ Raleigh knew that Pentecost’s pride was on the line too. He still knew how to push his CO’s buttons. 

The buzz in the room shifted when Mako stepped onto the mat and the air in the Kwoon was suddenly electrifying. Raleigh noted how her body language had changed completely. She was a real fighter and he would not underestimate her. The first two points went by quickly. They were feeling each other out. Intuitively, he knew that she was the one and he guided her through the session. There had to be no doubt about their compatibility. Drifting wasn’t just about combat skill. They weren’t actually on the floor to hurt each other, not the way Chuck probably wanted to rip him limb from limb. Their combat was about achieving communion, it was about being in-tune, about the trust and elegance of dance partners. 

When it was over, Raleigh threw his arm about her shoulders and said proudly, “She’s my co-pilot.” He caught Herc’s eye as he said this and saw the gleam of approval there. Their compatibility was undeniable. No other candidate had even been close. 

Unfortunately, the only opinion that mattered belonged to Stacker Pentecost and he did not agree. The Marshal refused, despite Raleigh’s protests and the session ended on a sour note, Mako bowing respectfully before leaving the Kwoon close to tears. He’d turned to Herc in exasperation, but the older Ranger gestured for him to go after Mako. Raleigh understood that Herc was about to intercede on their behalf. He knew that Herc and Pentecost shared a long history, had piloted the very first generation of Jaegers together. He was heartened by the thought of Herc standing up for them as he went in search of whom he hoped to be his future co-pilot. 

Mako only spoke to him briefly before shuttering herself away in her room. Raleigh felt like he’d done a poor job of comforting her, but neither did Mako seem to be the sort of person who needed comfort at this time. If anything, she’d stood up to him, believing in respect instead of rebellion. There was a missing piece in her relationship with Pentecost that Raleigh was yet to figure out. A certain tension and closeness existed between the two of them that seemed to go beyond a Commanding Officer and a subordinate. Raleigh decided that he would ask Herc about it. It was likely the other man knew something. 

He was just on his way to find Herc when whom should he run into, almost literally, but Chuck. 

“Watch where you’re going, Becket,” Chuck sneered. 

Raleigh barely looked at him, holding up both his hands in apology as he sidestepped the other man, only to have Chuck anticipate his action and block him again. He stopped and this time made direct eye contact.

“Maybe you should be the one to watch where you’re going, _Chuck_ ,” Raleigh replied evenly. He could sense Chuck’s anger bubbling just beneath the surface. It wouldn’t have surprised him if they had it out right then in the hallway. Raleigh didn’t think Chuck knew how to deal with his emotions in any other way. Perhaps Chuck was as tactile as his father, only in a different way. 

“Stay away from my dad,” Chuck said menacingly, dropping his voice even though they were the only two in the hallway. 

“Or what?” Raleigh replied. 

It was the _wrong_ thing to say. Raleigh registered the slight widening of Chuck’s irises before a fist came flying in the direction of his face. He ducked instinctively, balling his right hand into a fist as he did so, swinging upwards and hitting Chuck squarely in the back. The other man grunted and staggered back a step. His face was contorted in a snarl and Raleigh braced himself for another strike when someone interrupted them. 

“Hansen!” a voice yelled. 

Chuck glanced back over his shoulder, not breaking his fighting stance. 

It was Tendo. 

“Stop dicking around and get your ass to Striker’s hangar. Your techs need your expertise.” 

Chuck scowled but dropped his fists, turning to face Tendo fully. “Since when do you talk to me like that, Choi?” he called back. 

“Since you were twelve,” Tendo shot back, walking towards them. “Now get the hell out of here.” 

Chuck spared Raleigh one more withering look, saying under his breath, “This isn’t over.” He pushed past Raleigh, shoving him hard in Raleigh’s bad shoulder and Raleigh had to suppress a wince at the impact. 

When Chuck had rounded the corner and was out of earshot, Tendo remarked, “I forgot how good you were at making friends.” 

“It’s hard to resist my sparkling personality,” Raleigh replied dryly. 

They managed to keep their faces straight for a whole second before they began to laugh. There were times when irony didn’t work because the truth was Raleigh had _always_ been great at making friends, precisely _because_ he had such a winning personality, minor rebellion issues aside. Chuck was clearly immune to his charm, however. 

“So, aren’t you going to thank me?” Tendo asked when their laughter died down. 

Raleigh gave him an appraising look. “You really think that Baby Hansen was going to hand me my ass?” 

Tendo shrugged. “After the display you just put in Kwoon? Probably not. I meant, thank me for saving you from _Pentecost_. You can’t go around beating up the golden boy of the PPDC. You remember what that was like, right?” 

Raleigh grinned ruefully. Tendo _did_ have a point. 

“Probably saved you from Herc, too,” the J-Tech officer went on. “It don’t matter if you’re sleeping with him. He’s not gonna take kindly to you beating the crap out of his son whom he loves more than life itself but would probably lose an arm, a leg and his left nut before he’d be able to express it.” 

Raleigh’s mouth fell open and he had to remind himself to shut it. “How the hell,” he began after a moment. 

Tendo leaned towards him, a look of frightening maniacal glee on his face. “The walls have eyes and ears,” he said. 

“What?” Raleigh exclaimed. “You don’t even –”

“Mako told me.” 

“Jesus Christ!” 

Tendo slapped him on the shoulder – on his _good_ shoulder. “Welcome back to the PPDC, Becket,” he said brightly. “Seriously, though? I’m glad for Herc. God only knows when was the last time he got laid. A man has certain needs, otherwise it just isn’t healthy.” 

Raleigh knew he was looking at Tendo like the other man had just turned purple and sprouted two heads, but he couldn’t help himself. 

“I don’t,” he began. “I mean, I don’t think it was just about sex,” he said after a moment. 

Tendo shook his head. “No, I don’t think so either,” he agreed. “Herc isn’t one to just jump into bed with anybody.” 

“Did you just call me a slut?” 

“No, Becket.” Tendo grinned. “You’re a man-whore, but you’re one of the good ones.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mixk, 
> 
> I've remixed part of the previous chapter, but didn't advance much in terms of plot. I'm plotted out from _Now the Day is Over_ (like _totally_ ) so I'm more than willing to follow your lead on this. Also, I don't have any objections to stretching the timeline out a bit. The events in the film are so condensed. 
> 
> So . . . your turn! :-)
> 
> menel 
> 
> (And if readers have any suggestions, we're open to them too! *g*)


	8. (You'll Never Love Someone Till You're) Broken Hearted

Raleigh and Mako's trial run was a disaster, and Herc could hardly feel relief when the crisis was averted. Had Stacker been right ? Had his relationship with Raleigh affected the drift today? Most likely not, Herc reassured himself. Mako had chased the R.A.B.I.T., she'd got lost in one of her own memories. He couldn't dwell on it much longer, as he was summoned into Stacker's office with Chuck. His son was fuming beside him as they followed Stacker to his office.

Chuck lashed out as soon as the door closed, causing Herc to flinch with every harsh word that came out of his son's mouth.

"She can't control her drift, and he went out of phase first!"

"We all know what happened," Herc said, trying to appease his son as best as he could, but it was no easy feat, as he'd come to learn over the years. Even he couldn't defend Raleigh after what had happened. They could've all died.

"We can't afford mistakes, the kaijus keep evolving, and they keep kicking our asses," Chuck pointed out, and as much as Herc hated to admit it, his son was right. They were nearing the end, and a tiny misstep could cost them greatly. Even the best of their pilots had fallen, and if Herc had understood right, the next kaijus were going to be even bigger and fiercer than the ones they'd defeated in the past. "He's a has-been, she's a rookie. I don't want them protecting my bomb run, sir."

On that note, Chuck stormed off, and Herc was left standing in the middle of the office, frozen on his feet.

"You need to watch your tone, Mr. Hansen," Stacker said, although Herc didn't hear him disagreeing with Chuck. No matter how brashly Chuck acted sometimes, he still was a brilliant fighter, one whose opinion was rarely irrelevant. Stacker knew that just as well as Herc did, and the way things were now, Raleigh and Mako didn't seem ready for this kind of mission. Herc went to the door before Chuck could get too far, noticing Raleigh and Mako waiting outside.

"Oi! Stay there, give me a moment," he told Chuck, closing the door behind him to turn to Stacker. There was so much damage control to do, and he had no idea what was going on in Stacker's head at the moment. Mako was basically his daughter, and Herc couldn't even begin to imagine how Stacker must've felt. Chuck's first drift couldn't have gone any more smoothly as it had, much to Herc's surprise. His son really had been born for this, and it pained Herc to think he'd robbed Chuck of his childhood, of his chance at a normal life. It had ultimately been his decision to join the Jaeger program after Scissure, to raise Chuck in the military life. He'd just never anticipated his son to become a war machine. Had she been given the opportunity earlier, Herc had no doubt Mako would be as deadly as Chuck was at the moment. Now just wasn't the right time for her to dip her toes in, to fully take control of the drift.

Herc needed to speak to Stacker still, if only to give his friend some perspective on the situation—perhaps even some words of comfort—after Chuck's verbal outrage.

"Stacker—"

"Have you talked to Mr. Becket, yet?" Stacker cut him off, straight to the point, gaze meeting Herc's. Stacker wasn't kidding around, and beneath that calm demeanor, Herc knew lay a dormant volcano dying to explode.

"Didn't get the chance yet, no," Herc said carefully. Even he knew not to piss Stacker off when he was in this state.

"I hope you understand better now," Stacker continued, walking around his desk to approach him. "Your son doesn't hold Mr. Becket in his heart."

"Even when I end things with Raleigh, what I feel for him won't just disappear that easily," Herc argued, all but resolved to listen to Stacker now—he won't make Stacker think he's going to disobey, at the very least. No matter his feelings for Raleigh, the war still came first. Chuck still came first. The world relied on them, and Herc's own happiness didn't seem worth risking losing everything to those monsters.

"Be that as it may, the more memories of Mr. Becket you hold, the less effective your drift with Chuck will be, I can assure you that," Stacker replied, and Herc couldn't deny that it made sense.

"Chuck wouldn't be so easily disturbed," Herc mumbled, more to himself than to Stacker. Chuck was one of the best pilots the program had known, after all, and Herc refused to believe that his son would be that easily affected by his memories of Raleigh. But then again, with Chuck's temper, who could know?

"Are you willing to bet the lives of billions on that?" Stacker asked, lifting an eyebrow as he challenged him with his eyes. Herc heaved a tired sigh, rubbing a hand over his face as he cursed under his breath. "Look, Herc. You're my oldest friend, and I hope you understand that as your friend, I would never ask that of you. But I'm asking as your Marshall."

"I know," Herc said, voice low and defeated. He could see no other choice now. Gipsy Danger wasn't going to be deployed, and they couldn't afford to have Striker Eureka's efficiency affected by anything, not now of all times.

"I'll talk to Mr. Becket, make him understand, if it makes things any easier," Stacker suggested, as though it made things better. Herc would still have to face Raleigh afterwards. What if Raleigh didn't understand? Herc would have to break it to the younger man that he did agree with Stacker. There was a loud commotion outside that caught their attention, prompting them to go take a look. Herc had a bad feeling.

"Hey! That's enough! What's going on?" Herc shouted, mortified by the scene in front of him. What he saw as he came out of Stacker's office was worse than what he'd expected. So much worse. Raleigh had Chuck pinned to the floor, leg holding Chuck's neck in a tight lock. So many people had gathered to watch the fight, too, as though it wasn't embarassing enough to have his son fight with a fellow ranger. "On your feet ! Both of you!"

Herc walked over to Chuck, the latter looking quite in bad shape, and Herc could only guess his son had been losing to Raleigh before he came. He could tell Chuck was ready to attack again, and Herc stopped him just in time. Jesus Christ, Raleigh had beat Chuck up, and Herc just didn't know how he felt about that.

"Hey! This is over!" Herc said, glaring at Chuck, anger and disappointment surging through him. "You're a ranger for Chrissake, why don't you start acting like one?"

Chuck ignored him, walking away instead, probably to go nurse his wounds. Herc didn't know what to do with Chuck anymore, and was absolutely devastated to see things come to this. To have to choose between Raleigh and Chuck, it was as though fate was keen on proving Stacker right. Herc turned around to face Stacker, the look the latter gave him more than telling. Herc could see the exhaustion on his friend's face, as well as the disappointment, the regret of being right. Herc let Stacker get back in his office, where Raleigh and Mako were waiting for him, and Herc left. He was in no state to witness what Stacker was about to tell them, not ready to look Raleigh in the eye when Stacker broke the news down to him.

He walked back to his room, feeling lonelier than ever. He wanted to see Raleigh, to hold him in his arms. He didn't know what state of mind Raleigh was in, but Herc could only assume it was nothing good. Stacker's intervention would no doubt make things worse. Most importantly, Herc wondered how Raleigh would react to Stacker ordering them to end their still so young relationship. He entered his room, feeling like the world weighed on his shoulders, and longed for a hot bath. He couldn't afford such a luxury, unfortunately, but a hot shower would do. With so few pilots left in this base, Herc didn't have to share a room with Chuck, and it was just as well. He wasn't in the mood to face his son, part of him blaming Chuck for keeping Raleigh and him apart.

He scrubbed his face tiredly under the warm water stream, trying to work out the kinks in his shoulders, but failing miserably. He couldn't keep Raleigh out of his mind, his thoughts drifting back to last night. Everything between them had happened so fast. In less than 24 hours, they had gone from sleeping together to implicitly agreeing to a relationship, only to have said relationship coming to an end now, on their Marshal's orders. Stacker probably had told Raleigh by now, Herc thought as he finished with his shower, and as though on cue, he heard knocks at his door. Drying himself off quickly, he put on some comfortable clothes before answering the door, his heart dropping heavily when he found himself face to face with Raleigh.

"Hey," Herc said, hand still on the door, not knowing what to do or say. Raleigh's expression was unreadable, making Herc that much more nervous. They stood silently opposite each other across the threshold, Herc's eyes not quite meeting Raleigh's.

"Hey," Raleigh said, and it took every ounce of will power Herc had in him not to gather Raleigh in his arms, to kiss him breathless. He realized in that instant he'd already forgiven Raleigh for beating up his son, and fuck, what kind of father did that make him? Granted, knowing him, Chuck had probably provoked Raleigh into the fight, but still. What father chose their lover over their own blood and flesh?

Their eyes met briefly, and for that one second, Herc lost himself in the beautiful shade of blue that were Raleigh's eyes, his earlier resolves all but gone as he reached out for Raleigh's hand, tugging the latter close for a kiss. If things were to end, he wanted another kiss before it was over, nevermind that their last one was barely a couple of hours ago. Raleigh didn't respond, and it was enough of a sign for Herc to pull away, heart sinking in his chest.

"I'm sorry," Herc said as he let go of Raleigh's hand, gaze dropping to his feet as he stepped back. There were so many things Herc had to apologize for, and he hoped Raleigh got them all. He was never great with words—hell, his strained relationship with Chuck was the perfect testament to that—and he wished now more than ever that he could find the right ones in this situation. Even if his brain had come to the logical conclusion they were better off being nothing more than fellow rangers, his heart didn't seem to agree. And hadn't he promised to fight for their relationship?

"Wow. So you actually agree with Stacker, huh?" Raleigh said, as neutral as anyone could get, and Herc didn't know to make of that. Raleigh had closed off, acting like a stranger to him, and in a sense, it was worse than straight resentment, indifference.

"Don't you?" Herc asked, testing the waters. It was a coward move, to try to align himself with Raleigh's opinion. He didn't want to hurt Raleigh's feelings, and he knew it was a dangerous game.

"It doesn't matter what I think, Herc, I want to know what _you_ think," Raleigh shot back, a streak of anger in his voice as he stepped closer to him. "But I guess you already said it all, didn't you?"

"Raleigh—"

"Be honest, was sex all you wanted, Herc? If so, I want you to say it out loud, say it to my face instead of hiding behind Stacker," Raleigh said, folding his arms across his chest, the fire burning in his eyes pretty clear now. It knocked the breath out of him, Raleigh's words were like a punch to the gut. There was nothing Herc wanted more than to pursue things with Raleigh, but he didn't want to find out what Stacker had in mind, if they were to keep seeing each other despite Stacker's clear orders. Herc was torn apart, for the only thing he thought he could find solace in was already tainted with so many complications.

"No," Herc started, swallowing the lump in his throat as he tried to think of what to say. They were still standing too far apart for Herc's liking, but he didn't feel like he had the right to touch Raleigh anymore. That hurt more than anything. "Raleigh, you're about the best thing that's happened to me in a long while."

"But?"

"But you've heard Stacker, you've seen the vitriol my son has for you. I just don't know if it's wise for us to be together now," Herc finished, breathing heavily now, leaving the _'or if ever'_ out, because he couldn't even fathom the thought himself. Because if not now, when could they ever be together? Probably never, their own deaths hanging above their heads. He didn't expect it to be so hard to say, didn't expect the words to hurt so much. It all felt so final. So real. He'd never been selfish enough to fight for what he wanted, and he couldn't see himself starting now. Raleigh cupped his chin, lifting it up to meet his eyes; and as Herc blinked, a couple of tears fell down his face.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really had a hard time trying to find a convincing obstacle for Herc and Raleigh. I hope this works. Also, the last scene there at the end? I didn't want to dip my toes too deep when it came to Raleigh's reaction. I already feel like I've gone too far. I'd rather have menel's insight into Raleigh's head on this. I wrote what I felt Raleigh would say, I'm just not sure it's accurate.
> 
> I've rewatched the movie yesterday, and damn can Stacker be one scary motherfucker. _"All I need from you is your compliance and your fighting skills. And if I can't get that, then you can go back to the wall that I found you crawling on."_ Remember that scene? I don't think Stacker would be as nice to Raleigh as he is to Herc in this chapter. Anyways, hope you're enjoying the story, let us know what you think !
> 
> \- Mixk


End file.
